Hello, lovelies!
A most of you know (or will now know), I am gay. Well, beyond gay lol. But the point being. I’ve struggled with this so much in my life. I don’t like being gay. I really don’t. People look at me differently. In a bad way. Men rarely want anything to do with me, at least the straight ones. I still act the same. I still do the same things. You think they would have figured it out on their own? Oh well.
I love doing my little “gay” activities, as people say. I love making my tea, going out for lovely strolls with the intentions of picking flowers, I love chick flicks and a nice book, and a lovely evening out with my ladies. But I still hatehatehate. Part of me thinks that things would be SO much better if I was straight. One good thing in particular…….but I am so sure of this it’s not even funny! Beyond gay gay gay gay. Butterflies and rainbows, people!
Ah, alas. It’s nice to stare at a cute boy’s ass sometimes. 
love, jt
Elizabeth Kaylene said,
May 7, 2009 at 3:36 pm
Hello, I found you through somewhatvoluble.com — whom I found through http://rachieann.com (following the yellow brick road, here)!
I went through a period where I hated being bisexual. A lot of people think “it doesn’t exist,” and then you’ve got the people who are homophobic. I still have my days where I struggle with it — Should I date a guy or should I date a girl? Am I just indecisive, a poser? — but mainly I just ignore it. Honestly. I know that sounds so sad, but it’s true.
I guess, when it comes down to it, it’s about learning to love and accept yourself. I went through quite a long period where I hated myself, and now that I’ve grown a little and learned to love myself, it’s gotten a lot easier to accept that part of me. It isn’t easy, but it’s easier — if that makes sense.
artshadows said,
May 11, 2009 at 12:17 am
Hello, lovely!
I’ve never once even considered the feelings of “homophobes” and people who will look down on my style of life, it’s all about myself and how I view my life and what I do with it…but that in itself is a struggle. And having lost so much to truly be who I am, it makes me wonder at what cost it is…idk.
You have a lovely blog, though, ma’am! I hope to stop by again soon! Peace,love&chocolate
jt
Elizabeth Kaylene said,
May 12, 2009 at 5:55 am
I just realized that the “Snapshot” of my blog is forever old!
I tend to just ignore that part of me, which is wrong I know, but the only thing I know to do. Otherwise things just get way too confusing. (It’s kind of like when I think too hard about where we humans came from, ha ha ha!)
Thanks for stopping by my Letters of Love. I’m glad you like it. (: